Revolución de Cuba

The Friary, Cardiff [map]

What better way to commemorate an armed revolt that took place on a Caribbean island in the 1950s than with a themed drinks emporium in the centre of the Welsh capital?

It's billed as a 'rum bar'. Or, as we used to call them back in the day, a 'rough pub'.

Despite this, the staff are, in fact, pretty friendly. Indeed, rather than being told, "I don't really think this is your sort of place, lads," in a threatening tone by the barman, he instead cheerily alerts us to the cocktail offers.

The whole thing is done with a lot more panache than Bar Cuba (now The Live Lounge), which used to be over the road.

It's spacious without giving the impression that you're sitting in a huge warehouse that just happens to be full of mismatched furniture and random signs in Spanish.

Although those sofas are so low that if you get carried away with the cheap cocktails, you have pretty much zero chance of subsequently resuming a vertical base.

The aesthetic is let down somewhat by the fact of the flooring being more Carpetright than Cuba, but there you go.

There's live music on Friday and Saturday nights, when they also hand out trilbies and false moustaches to enable punters to complete the, erm, look. They must be Havana laugh.

Steam Bar

The Friary, Cardiff [map]

We'd really rather not but we're obliged to visit the Steam Bar for the sake of completism. It's a bit like going to the dentist: just because you know it's coming doesn't make it any less painful.

We trudge to the bar reluctantly, like condemned men to the gallows.

It's worse than we thought. Not worse than death, obviously. Come on: let's get some perspective here, people.

But this is clearly no place for thirsty barflies in urgent need of reasonably priced brews.

We quickly learn that of the four - four! - draught beers, both the Beck's and Brains Smooth are off. As a result, we grudgingly make do with two pints of Stella, the total cost of which is a staggering £9.20.

On second thoughts, it does feel like a small death.

The bar's attached to the Hilton and predominantly seems to serve hotel guests on their way out to find somewhere else that offers a wider range of drinks at more competitive prices. (Not that difficult, to be honest.)

Presumably, it's this reliance on a wholly transient clientele that also explains why no one has felt the need to update the decor in about 15 years.

Although nothing can justify hanging a large black-and-white photo of Pat Butcher on the wall.

The upper seating area. Looks like they're having about as good a time as we are.

Next!

Ha Ha Bar & Grill

The Friary, Cardiff [map]


Hmmm. A bar cunningly disguised as a multi-storey car park. Not a tactic we would have necessarily employed ourselves, but there you go.


We don't quite understand why they stock bottles of Peroni and Stella given that they already have them on tap.

And another thing: what's the point in having a bottle of beer at all if you can't stick a wedge of lime in it? (A word of advice - don't ever stick a wedge of lime in a bottle of Stella.)


This is one of those places that thinks it's a lot hipper than it actually is. Come on - exposed brickwork? How 20th century is that?


As the '& Grill' element of the name suggests, it's a set-up that caters as much for dining as it does for drinking.

Indeed, if you're looking to achieve maximal refreshment (as we inevitably are), this probably isn't the place for you.


If, on the other hand, you're in the market for a farm-assured chicken breast, topped with melted mozzarella and crispy serrano ham, drizzled with extra-virgin olive oil and rocket pesto, served on seasonal potatoes and green beans, in a rich cherry tomato sauce, then you've made a wise choice.


Rich cherry tomato sauce or otherwise, there's something peculiar going on in the toilets. There's no soap to speak of, yet there's an abundant supply of hand & body lotion.

It's the sort of hygiene-to-moisturising ratio that, frankly, alarms us.

Since our visit, Mitchells & Butlers have shut Ha Ha - it's currently being refurbished and is due to re-open as Browns Bar & Brasserie in late March. Let's hope they use it as an opportunity to sort out the soap situation in the men's loos, if nothing else.

Bar Cuba

9 The Friary, Cardiff [map]


Do bars in Cuba really look like this? Probably not. Still, the pseudo-shack facade certainly makes a change from the blandly modernist exteriors of the other bars around here.

For the record, it's absolutely nowhere near a beach - despite what it says over the door.


Indeed, a 'beach cocktail lounge' is a pretty unlikely theme for a drinking hole in Cardiff city centre. But Bar Cuba's idiosyncratic approach is part of its appeal.

That, plus the fact that it never seems to get busy during the week, so you're always served straight away. A good choice then if you're really thirsty.


For somewhere that's meant to be at the seaside, it's all a bit gloomy.


The balcony houses a few extra tables, a tiny bar and some really terrible paintings.


We spotted Noel from Hear'Say in here once. Perhaps he was waiting for the free beer.